Sunday, January 4, 2009

The Drive

With the train we drove to Vienna.
into Prater Park.
The drive was short and fast.
Vienna had been reached.
The north station.
with the express car into Prater
                        Amusement Park.
there we stood at the Ferris wheel.
We rode around once with —
There it has with the trumpet
                                      blown.
And we looked at Vienna.

Translated by Gary Sullivan.

* * *

Die Ausfahrt

Mit dem Zug fuhren wir nach Wien.
in den Wr. Prater.
Die Ausfahrt war kurz und schnell.
Wien war erreicht worden.
Der Nordbahnhof.
mit dem D-Wagen in den Wiener-
                        Wurstelprater.
dort standen wir am Riesenrad.
Wir fuhren einmal eine Runde mit —
Da hat er mit der Trompete ge-
                                      blasen.
Und wir sahen über Wien.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

"Wir sahen über Wien": we viewed Vienna, we gazed at Vienna, not "we saw".

Gary said...

Thank you, Anonymous. I admit I'm surprised to learn this.

After thinking about it, I've changed the line from "we saw over Vienna" to "we looked at Vienna."

I definitely feel, as a reader, a difference between "saw" and "looked at," with the latter giving more of a sense of distance--emotional distance.

"Saw" almost implies a kind of acceptance or connection that "looked at" doesn't, if that makes sense. "Looked at" keeps the reader closer to the viewer. "Saw" puts the readers somewhere between the writer and what is seen.

I've gone ahead and made the change in part from reading a piece in German somewhere online about Herbeck's poetry, which described it as very "distant" in a way that made one feel the poet himself felt an insurmountable distance from the world.